By Skyler Kociuba
Ever since I can remember, I have been empathetic to a fault. My mother says the first time she knew I had a deep understanding of the emotions of others around me was when I was 4 years old, telling her to persevere on the night she lost her mother.
Then, as I got older and developed some autonomy, I became the “therapist friend”. You know, that friend that everyone goes to with their problems and that “gives the best advice”? I was always willing to lend an ear, wanted everyone to feel included, and tried my best to give the best advice possible to those around me.
I was an overachieving student academically, held a part-time job starting when I was 16, and was part of numerous leadership organizations that allowed me to mentor the underclassmen, plan fundraisers, and support my fellow students. I even graduated with a medal recognizing my role in the mentorship program.
Still, in high school, it didn’t quite hit me that becoming a therapist was going to be my career path.
A bumpy road to a therapist’s office
The summer between high school and college was a doozy when a series of unfortunate (which now I view as partially fortunate) events occurred.
Within the span of 3 weeks, I started immunotherapy for allergies, which put me at risk for anaphylaxis each week. As someone with health anxiety, this was nightmarish to begin with, but then, my brother went into anaphylaxis for the first time ever due to an unknown peanut allergy and was extremely close to death.
The following weekend, I was in a car accident on my way to Iowa, which involved the car I was a passenger in getting hit while driving on the expressway by a stolen vehicle driving 120MPH that was actively involved in a police chase.
My brain and body went into overdrive. I had my first panic attack while lying on the floor in my boss’s office at work 6 days later. This all led me to seeing a therapist, whom I still see to this day. With this being said, I still didn’t have my “AHA” moment.
Discovering my path in college
I entered college set on biology being my major, thinking it would guide me down the career path of animal welfare and zoology. One cold winter afternoon in Wisconsin, standing in a creek with a leaky wader, I realized I was not going to survive another 3 years of this, and this most certainly was NOT my career path.
As fate would allow it, I was concurrently enrolled in a neuroscience class that talked about the fundamentals of neuroscience and psychology, which I loved. While I didn’t know what I was going to do with this degree, I was excited to start my 2nd year of college with the new track of majoring in psychology.
How my own therapy journey led me here
While I continued to see my wonderful therapist during this time in my life, naturally, I sought out her opinion and asked, “What the heck am I going to do with this psychology degree? I can’t diagnose people without a doctorate, and I don’t have 8 more years of school in me!”
You can only imagine my surprise when she opened my eyes to all of the wonderful possibilities of being a mental health counselor.
Her unwavering support and guidance gave me my lightbulb moment. I wanted to be just like her. I was going to be a therapist.
With this newfound goal at the end of the path, as my journey continued, I worked in a lab for suicide prevention and had a work study where I was a victim advocate at a local sexual assault and domestic violence shelter. These experiences led me to apply and accept a spot in a Clinical Mental Health Master’s Program at Loyola University Chicago.
Supporting teens—just like I once was
Through the support of my family and friends, I finished my degree and internship hours and started my career as a therapist.
My previous position as a group therapist in an adolescent partial hospitalization program fueled my passion for working with teenagers. Over the last 2.5 years, I have learned the impact families, friends, schools, social media, therapists, and society as a whole have on a teen’s mental health.
I strive to nurture the best in clients I see because without the village of people mentioned above who helped me on my journey to this point, I would not be who I am today.
About the Author:
Skyler Kociuba, LPC
Skyler is a Licensed Professional Counselor with a passion for working with adolescents, children, and adults, guiding them through a unique journey of healing and self-discovery.
With over three years of experience in mental health, she specializes in anxiety, depression, trauma, grief, behavioral issues, personality disorders, and more.