By Justin Noe
Crafting meaning: my role as a Counselor
The journey through life is a path we navigate that is composed of a series of choices; choices mundane, choices reflexive, choices we agonize over, choices we may come to regret, choices that fill us with pride and choices we feel unable to decide upon.
I believe that it is through the actions we choose, or do not choose, that we as people become who we are. It is in this way that traumatic experiences we have had, fears or worries we contend with, hurt we have endured and confusion as to who we are or want to be come to play a significant role in the challenges and complexities of life.
As a Counselor, the part I play in serving others comes from a place of understanding: seeking to understand the story of your life, helping you to understand who you wish to be -and- through intentionality in the choices you make – assist you in understanding how to become that version of yourself.
My path to this place of serving others
I grew up in North Texas, the first child of later divorced parents; my mother hailed from the Chicagoland area and my father was from the Dallas area. My early life was a story of ups and downs: fond memories of playing pee-wee baseball and football with childhood friends, going to church with my grandmother on Sundays, witnessing the turbulent decline of my parents’ marriage -and- being compelled into anger management group therapy due to how I acted out the hurt I was experiencing.
As the time came for me to begin taking the wheel in my life path at 18, I was paralyzed by confusion and fear. I worried about making “the wrong choice” in my education and career path. I was fearful of replaying the same dysfunction in romantic relationships that had caused my family to fall apart. I remained hurt from the challenges of my past that obscured my understanding of myself – because I couldn’t grow as a person while I remained wounded by the trauma of my youth. I dropped out of college after 2 years and 3 different majors, feeling like a failure for not being able to find decisiveness in choices I was presented with.
My next steps were made out of desperation and trying to find a foothold in the path forward: I enlisted in the US Navy, intending to work as a Nuclear Systems Operator. Before long, this intention was denied – as I was forced to choose another specialty. While I again contended with feeling as though I had failed, I chose to try out something vastly different and became a Hospital Corpsman. I wanted to be a Cardiology Technician – but was informed that this option was not available to me. This is when I found my way into the field of mental health, when I enrolled in and completed training as a Behavioral Health Technician.
From there I discovered satisfaction, commitment, healing and intentionality – through the execution of my duties and in my own therapy as a client when I struggled with a period of depression. The meaning I made in my life led me to see this line of work as indispensable to modern life and something worth choosing. I choose to be a Counselor every day, to help others understand and choose to become who they wish to be.
Understanding your past to see your choices clearly
In order to derive comfort with making choices for myself, I had to come to terms with and accept how my past had shaped me. My hurt had driven me to avoid risks which might have hurt me further; my confusion about who I believed I could be limited my sight of the possibilities of how my choices might shape my future self. This is the lens through which I approach my work with others: coming to a new sense of understanding about how your past intersects with your present and choosing what comes next.
Through a combination of my professional experience working in mental health for 13 years and my own past history I have found a passion for working with clients challenged with:
- Navigating life after experiencing Trauma
- Anger interfering with relationships
- Anxiety overwhelming your day-to-day experience
- Being stuck in a cycle of Depression
- Feeling Confused about who you are and/or want to be when facing new phases of life such as developing a career, starting college or becoming a parent
The words we use are important – these words, phrases and labels often become more significant in how we define ourselves than any other factor. I place great emphasis on collaborating with you in analyzing the self-talk you use and ask why a particular word may continue to come up and what it might say about how you perceive yourself, others, the world around you or the future. We work together to make an understanding about how your past led to these becoming your pattern, how that affects the choices you have or make -and- fostering the potential for choices that would lead to you becoming the version of yourself that you want.
Charting a course on one’s journey through life
You are in the driver’s seat in the road trip of life, full of choices and action. This can be exhausting, overwhelming and at times harrowing, especially when you feel as though you are on the trip by yourself. I see my role as a navigator – a human GPS. We will work together to look at where you have been, where you wish to be and explore different routes to getting there. You are at the wheel and this can be a wonderful fact. Let’s plot your course and learn how to enjoy the trip along the way!